Crazy Funny Birthday Quotes I always limit my budget on buying birthday gifts according to what that person gave me as a gift on my birthday. Enjoy your gift of nothing! Happy birthday to the only person I would rescue in the event of a zombie apocalypse.
Crazy Funny Birthday Quotes
Happy birthday to one of the few people whose birthday I can remember without a Facebook reminder.
Forget about the past, you can’t change it. Forget about the future, you can’t predict it. Forget about the present, I didn’t get you one.
May your Facebook wall be filled with birthday wishes from people you’ve never met, haven’t seen in years, or genuinely couldn’t care less about.
On your birthday don’t forget to set goals that are sky high and spend the rest of the year miserably trying to build a rocket to get there.
You’re a really hard individual to shop for… so I didn’t get you anything. Happy birthday!
Happy birthday to the only person I would rescue in the event of a zombie apocalypse.
If you were Jesus, today would be Christmas!
Smart, good looking, and funny. But enough about me. Happy birthday!
May you live to be so old that the very sight of you terrifies babies and ex-lovers. Happy birthday!
It’s your birthday, the anniversary of the day you triumphantly escaped from your mother’s womb. So, that’s pretty cool.
They say take every birthday with a grain of salt. I say take it with a whole bunch of salt, and bonus points if it accompanies a very large margarita. Make yours a double. Happy birthday!
Happy birthday! I hope you celebrate this birthday the way you celebrated the first one, naked and screaming.
Forget about the past you can’t change, the future you can’t predict, and definitely forget about the present because I didn’t get you one. Happy birthday!
Happy birthday! May your heart today be as full as your Facebook wall will be with birthday messages from people you’ve never spoken to.
Crazy Funny Birthday Wishes
Everyone gets to be young once. Today it’s official, your turn is over. Happy birthday!
Friends celebrate friends on their birthdays. Real friends get you drunk on your birthday. Good thing for you I’m the second kind.
I believe you forgot my birthday present last year, so now I’m returning the favor. Happy Birthday!
It’s your birthday? Let’s get up to some mischief!
A wise man once said, “Forget about your past – you cannot change it.” I’d like to add: “Forget about your present – I didn’t get you one.”
Happy Birthday to a [Mom/Dad] who’s smart, funny, and good-looking, from a [daughter/son] who inherited all your best qualities.
Funny birthday wishes about getting older:
You’re how old?! Better take that cake outdoors to light the candles! Have a very happy birthday.
It’s OK to light the candles on your birthday cake now; I’ve already alerted the fire department.
You know, they say that age is all in your mind. The key is to prevent it from trickling down into your body.
Every day we celebrate you… but today, you get a card.
Statistics show that those who have the most birthdays live the longest. You’re doing pretty well!
A wise person once said, “Forget about your past, you cannot change it.” I’d like to add: “Forget about your present, I didn’t get you one!”
Happy Easter. Christmas. Independence Day. You know what? Just eat your darn cake!
More : Crazy Funny Birthday Wishes For My self
Short Funny Birthday Wishes
Happy birthday! Remember, age is just a number, but wrinkles are real estate for wisdom!
Congrats on surviving another year! Just remember, at your age, it’s important to start using your blinker when changing lanes… in the grocery store!
It’s time to get this party started! But seriously, let’s get a move on—we both know you can’t stay up past 10 p.m.
Eventually you reach a point when you stop lying about your age and start bragging about it.Will Rogers
Truth
Today is the oldest you have been, and the youngest you will ever be. Make the most of it!Nicky Gumbel Quotes to Live By
We must both, I’m afraid, recognise that, as we grow older, we become like old cars – more and more repairs and replacements are necessary. C. S. Lewis Funny
The secret of staying young is to live honestly, eat slowly, and lie about your age.Lucille Ball Honesty
Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don’t mind, it doesn’t matter. Mark Twain Wise
No other music can make my heart sing the way your voice does. Happy birthday my love!
I asked the stars to shine brighter on your birthday, but they shied away saying that with your light so bright, you will not be able to see them anyway. Happy birthday to the light of my life!
I found paradise right here on Earth the day I met you. Happy birthday, my angel!
Crazy Funny Birthday Wishes For Girlfriend
The birthday of the most amazing person should be celebrated not only by us but by the whole world! Happy birthday, my love!
Our love was meant to be. It was God’s whispered wish written by the stars. Happy birthday my soulmate!
I want us to be together only twice, today and forever. Happy birthday, dear!
Your love is like a drug; the more I get it, the more I crave it. It is something that I cannot live without. Happy birthday, my love!
Happy birthday, my love. If a flower bloomed every time your thought crossed my mind, this world would have been a flower garden!
Your hypnotic eyes leave me so entranced that the whole world might end around us, but I still wouldn’t notice. Happy birthday, angel; you are truly magical!
Cousin, I just wanted to wish you a happy birthday! May it be filled with family, laughter and great memories.
We’re cousins by blood, sisters at heart and friends by choice. Happy birthday special cousin!
Happy birthday to my crazy, wonderful, hilarious and truly amazing cousin! I feel so lucky to have been able to grow up alongside you and I can’t wait for all the exciting adventures in our future! Love you so much!
You mean the absolute world to me, because you are the type of person who gives so unselfishly. I hope to be even half the person you are one day. Happy birthday!
Crazy Funny Birthday Wishes For cousin
You are a beautiful person, inside and out. I hope you always remember that. But if you don’t, I’ll be right here to remind you. Happy birthday, beautiful cousin!
Growing up with you was the greatest gift I ever received. Today, I want you to know how grateful I am to have you in my life and for all the special memories. Here’s to many more!
You see, you should not be ashamed of growing old, not only you get to play the smart guy all the time, but all antiques like you also have great value!
Happy birthday old man! My dearest friend, I know that you will love the gift I have bought you for tonight, but knowing your craving for sugar, you will probably be too busy stuffing your face with your own birthday to appreciate it.
Happy birthday! Remembering all the dumb stuff we’ve done throughout the years, I’m considering myself lucky you still are alive to celebrate another year of being reckless.
But that is what makes you yourself, so never stop doing dumb stuff with me, my friend. Happy birthday! No matter how much good food we’ve eaten these past years.
Nobody has come close to your cooking. So do everyone a favor and wish to become a chef when you blow out these candles. Happy birthday!
I will sing Happy Birthday to you so much you’ll wish you’d never been born… Happy Birthday!”
“Late in the evening, far, far away there is a glow beyond the horizon, and I know deep in my heart… It’s your birthday cake.”
“Knowing someone as fabulous as me should be the only present you need.”
“Happy birthday to one of the few people whose birthday I can remember without a Facebook reminder.”
“I hope your birthday is as awesome as your hair in high school.”
“Happy birthday to someone I hope is my friend even when we’re too senile to remember each other’s birthdays.”
Crazy Funny Birthday Wishes For Myself
“Happy birthday to a person that is charming, talented and witty, and reminds me a lot of myself.”
“You were born on this date, so we are going to put fire sticks in baked goods and sing at you while you sit there awkwardly.”
“Happy birthday. Thank you for always being older than me.”
“May your Facebook wall be filled with birthday wishes from people you’ve never met, haven’t seen in years, or genuinely couldn’t care any less about.”
“It is your birthday! Remember that researchers have said that birthdays are good for your health and people who have more birthdays live longer. May you get more birthdays.”
“Happy birthday, old friend! Now you really are an old friend. Not only one I’ve known for a long time – now you are officially ancient.”
“Happy birthday! May your heart today be as full as your Facebook wall will be with birthday messages from people you’ve never spoken to.”
“One minute, you’re young and fun. The next, you have a favorite burner on the stove. I think we both know which you are. Happy birthday!”
“For your birthday, I wanted to give you something that was both funny and charming, but then I remembered you already have me in your life. Happy Birthday!”
“If you feel a bit lonely, forgotten, or just need someone to cheer you up, remember… You can always change your birthday on Facebook! Happy Birthday!”
“Wow, another year under your belt. Just let me know how old we’re telling people you are now?! Happy Birthday!”
“Happy Birthday! Party hard, but not too hard – I hear hangovers get worse with age!”
“On your special day, I wish you peace, love, insight, relaxation, fun, knowledge, romance, friendship… and all that stuff that doesn’t cost anything. Happy Birthday!”
I’ve reached that period of my life when scrolling down to select birth year isn’t fun anymore. Happy birthday to myself!
I hope the price of candle skyrockets this year so my friends can’t afford to buy as many candles as my age on my birthday.
If I wasn’t born, the word ‘Awesome’ would have gone extinct from dictionaries. It feels wonderful to be someone of such importance. Happy birthday to myself!
I am a unique child of the Almighty! There is and will never be anyone like me. Glad to be a part of the divine. Thank god for this birthday to me!
Sarcastic Birthday wishes
On my birthday, I know my real friends by my bank alerts. You know what I’m saying?
Not many people understand this, but if you want to grow old and grow mature, you first have to be alive. I have been doing this for ages now!
I hope the price of candle skyrockets this year so my friends can’t afford to buy as many candles as my age on my birthday.
Sometimes I feel like I’m a diamond who just happened to be imported out of Africa a long time ago. Happy birthday to the living gem, the purest soul ever….. myself!
Happy birthday, sis! Remember, age is just a number – and in your case, a really big one!
You’re not just getting older, you’re getting better… at telling dad jokes. Happy birthday, sis!
Congratulations on making it another year without getting eaten by a bear! Happy birthday!
Happy birthday, sis! If you were a wine, you’d be getting better with age – but let’s face it, you’re more like a cheap beer.
Here’s to another year of pretending we like each other! Happy birthday, sis!
Happy birthday, sis! I hope you’re ready to party like it’s 1999… because that’s the last time you were cool.
Crazy Funny Birthday Wishes For Sister
Happy birthday to my favorite sister! Just kidding, you’re my only sister.
Happy birthday, sis! Don’t worry, I’m not counting the candles on your cake – I don’t want to start a fire!
Happy birthday, sis! You may be getting older, but at least you’re not getting any wiser.
Congratulations on another year of being my sister. It’s a tough job, but someone’s gotta do it. Happy birthday!
Happy birthday to the only person who truly understands how crazy our family is!
“On your special day, I wish you peace, love, insight, relaxation, fun, knowledge, romance, friendship… and all that stuff that doesn’t cost anything. Happy Birthday!”
“Happy Birthday! For your special day I made you a cake. BOOM YOU’RE A CAKE! You’re so very welcome.”
“Happy birthday to a lifelong friend! I can’t wait until we’re old enough to be terrorizing the senior home nurses together!”
“I can only hope to be as great a woman as you one day. But, obviously with better clothes. Happy birthday!”
“Happy Birthday Dad! When I grow up I want to be just like you… But hopefully with more hair! Love, your son.”
“Happy birthday to my brother who has the world’s greatest sister! You are so lucky haha! Hope this makes you smile and shake your head for the rest of your special day!”
“Happy birthday, my dearest friend! Hope you have the best day celebrating. I can’t wait to BOOP you on the nose in a few short months. Love you always.”
“Even with your ripe old age, you’re still the best friend someone could ask for. I’ll get the prune juice ready though. Happy Birthday.”
Everyone grows old but not everyone can grow wise. Please don’t be sad, my friend. Not everyone needs wisdom too. Happy Birthday!
Age is just a number, just like your salary. They keep increasing every year! So, why feel sad for one and happy for the other. Cheers to your birthday!
Happy birthday to someone who is too sweeter than sugar and spicy than Mexican chili.
Hope you will not get sad over the number of candles on your cake. Many happy returns of the day, my love.
Happy birthday to my bestie, the one person who understands me even when I don’t understand myself. Let’s keep being weird together.
Short Crazy Funny Birthday Quotes
You are just as annoying as you were on day one. Stay the same and have a happy birthday!
Today, my friend, you have made me grateful for something…that I’m not the oldest person here!
Friend, on this day of the year, many, many years ago, you were born! I guess that’s something!
Happy Birthday to someone who is getting more valuable and better with age! Oh wait–that’s wine. Happy Birthday to someone who is just getting old!
Friend, I hope that a million birthday wishes come true for you! It will match your age!
If I tried to count up to your age today, I would go hoarse! Happy Birthday, buddy!
Happy Birthday, friend! You were educated in the old ways! The pyramids wouldn’t have been built without you!
I’m so glad you were born because, without you, who would I have to make fun of?
Another year of surviving life, congrats!
Happy Birthday to the only person who is older than me.
You’re not old, you’re just a little bit closer to death. Congrats!
Another year of wisdom and wrinkles, happy birthday!
Happy Birthday to my partner in crime, let’s make some more questionable decisions this year!
It’s your birthday, so let’s eat cake and pretend we’re not getting older.
I can’t believe you’re still alive, congrats!
You’re not getting older, you’re just getting closer to becoming a classic.
Happy Birthday to someone who is still young enough to be foolish.
We thought we would get the right amount of candles to put on your cake this year, but quickly ran out of space.
One of the best pieces of advice in life is “you have to appreciate the little things”. That said, I know that spotting little things is easier said than done at your age!
Seeing as I usually forget everyone’s birthdays, you should consider it a miracle that I’m sending you this message. It’s about time one of us turned 18! Drinks are on you, then! Happy Birthday!
Don’t let your age get you down, it won’t be long until you are allowed to start learning to drive. But until then, on your bike!
To my brother who still owes me several big ones. I didn’t get you a gift this year, so let’s call it even.
I can’t believe how big you’re getting! Long gone are the days when I could steal cake from your plate and no one would ever be the wiser.
